Why You can Stop Feeling like a Failure as a Mom
We never quite know the impact we are having on our children.
We teach, we pray, we redirect, we pray some more; hoping that we are conveying just a fraction of what they need to live a successful life.
Although we may be doing all we can to raise our little blessings, human nature tends to lead us to focus on our downfalls—all the epic parenting failures.
They become center stage in our minds, performing the mistakes over and over again until we are convinced we are the most horrible parents that ever existed.
Ever had these moments? I’ll be the first to raise my hand.
Our bible time had been slacking for a few weeks.
I was reading my bible (on most days), but the kids were not.
I kept feeling the all too familiar pressure that most homeschooling parents face: The Kids Are Behind.
I’m not quite sure what they were behind in, because we set our own schedule.
But the pressure was real.
It was so real that I felt the need to cut out their Bible time in order to complete the rest of the assignments.
The only Bible time they were getting was during Family Time.
Between school, sports, other extracurricular activities and my own laundry list of things to get done, I felt like I was forced to put Bible time on the back burner.
Rather than being the first thing we did in the morning, it had become the “if we have enough time” subject.
I longed for my kids to know God in an intimate, personal way, but there was also the reality of what I had to get done.
The plan I had created to make it all work in the beginning, seemed to be falling apart.
Why you Can Stop Feeling like a Failure as a Mom
Feeling like a complete failure in this area, I did what I knew to do.
I prayed.
I asked God to draw my children closer to Him.
To let His grace somehow overshadow my inability to get everything done, including Bible time.
I needed reassurance that He would show up.
And He did.
Where I seem to fail, God prevails. What I lack as teacher, He Himself teaches.
God showed up to encourage me in the most unexpected way….. through my daughter’s English assignment.
As I began to read her paper, the frustration began to melt away.
The failure I felt as a parent dissolved as I began to realize Who was really teaching my kids.
It’s so interesting to me that she knows God so intimately.
The things she wrote about were so personal and profound.
I believe it was God Himself that gave her that revelation.
In that moment, He gave me a revelation as well…. I do what I can, and He will do the rest— in homeschooling and in life.
I could stop feeling like a failure as a mom.
He is faithful to teach, rebuke and guide my children.
Not that I sit back and do nothing, but when I’ve done all I can do, He will do what I cannot.
They were His children way before they were mine.
So today, I rest.
I rest from the striving, the worrying and the need to perform to “make” my children know God.
They know Him.
Today, He gave me a glimpse at just how well they do.
Do you need to stop feeling like a failure as a mom?
We all fail at some point. None of us are perfect. But we have a God who is.
Just as He is always there for us, He is always there for our children.
We can rest in His goodness and His ability to take care of our families.
Can we pray?
Thank you, Jesus that you speak to our children. From the youngest to the oldest, you are guiding them, instructing them and teaching them more about who You are. There is no length that You won’t go to show them Your character. Father, pour Your love out on our children today. Cut through any hurts, pains, or failures, and show them Your goodness. Help us as parents to rest in Your ability to take care of our children. Continue to show us how faithful You are…giving us glimpses of Your hand working in their lives. In Jesus’ name, Amen
Here’s a free download of the above prayer for you to keep:
This week I’m sharing a post by Bethany Kimsey on parenting in the dry seasons of life.
She writes about her longing to see God’s hand moving in the midst of the dry or unrewarding times of parenting….
I long for Your new thing. “Behold I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.” ~Isaiah 43:19. I long to see little rivulets begin to run in the dry beds of the hearts of my children and myself – to see a softening of soil crusted over with self reliance and self dependence as the truth that Jesus alone must lead seeps in – to see movement, formation, a becoming in both their heart and mine. Becoming a conduit for the Spirit’s living water promised by Jesus in John 7:37 when His voice rang out in the temple, “If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, out of his heart will flow rivers of living water.”
Read more of Hope in the Dry Seasons of Parenting
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This is beautiful, and how touched I am by your child’s assignment, what wisdom in her little he art! Yes, God is in charge of our parenting! I”m still learning this with my son now 18 ready to leave home.. how many mistakes we made, but God is not only forgiving, but in charge. I continue to pray, pray, pray for my son to stay close to Him and trust God holds him near! Visiting from nextdoor at #raralinkup.. PS I remember the homeschool guilt..not worth it! So good you are letting go letting God!
Thanks, Alisa. Great reminder . . . our kids were His before they ever were ours and He uses our feeble attempts at teaching them to accomplish more than we could ever imagine in ways we don’t expect. So thankful that we can trust Him to keep guiding them in the right way even when we don’t quite measure up.
Very true, Abi!! Why is it so hard for us to remember that when we are feeling down on our ourselves?? My heart knows He’ll show up, but my mind wants to convince me otherwise! Thanks for visiting today!
The way your daughter writes about God is so sweet, you are obviously teaching her well! #twinklytuesday
Thank you Kiri!! I do teach her, but it’s truly God’s grace that she know Him so well. Have a great week!
Hi!
Stopping by from #TellHisStory. “I do what I can, He will do the rest.” That is money. I love that statement. Thank you for the reminder. Momma of three-three beautiful little boys that take me to the limit of “what I can” – but worth the pushing.
Have a wonderful, wonderful day.
Thanks for stopping by Courtney! I know what you mean, with 5 kids- 2 of which are teenagers, I can literally feel pushed to the max! Have a great week!
Oh, Alisa, I can so relate! You’re right the pressure is real. I’ve launched four from homeschooling so far and I can tell you that our Bible time together remains one of my all-time favorite memories. But boy do we have to protect that time. Isn’t it something how our kids can help us keep that focus? Loved this.
So true, Lisa! I love studying the bible and teaching it to my kids- but it seems every distraction comes to try to steal that time!! Thanks for visiting today! Have a great weekend!
Alisa, how did you know? Thanks for this encouragement as a parent and as a homeschooling mum. The school year is seeming very long right now!
I know, right? The end of the year seems to drag on!!! But praise the Lord we are at the finish line!
Oh, Alisa, I love this! Thank you so much for speaking to my heart. I keep reverting to the old habit that it depends on me and my efforts, and feeling like I’m failing; but it’s all God and He is more than able. I love the line – ‘Where I seem to fail, God prevails. What I lack as teacher, He Himself teaches.’ And I love when He gives us little glimpses of His saving work… just to encourage our weary hearts… so thoughtful… such a good Father. Thanks Alisa for sharing this. Blessings to you!
Thank you, Carlie! I revert back to that same thing all.the.time. Why do we feel like we have to do everything ourselves?? #pride I love that God always shows Himself strong through our weaknesses. He is good, indeed! Have a great week! And thanks for stopping by today!
Hey Carlie! I visited your website and I loved your post! I tried to leave a comment 3 times and it kept kicking me off. internet issues. Just wanted to let you know I stopped by and enjoyed reading!
Alisa, thanks for articulating what many a mom has felt, this one included. I often say to myself (and my kids) “do what you can do and let God do the rest.” Thanks for the great practical reminder of this! Glad I stopped by from #OpenMicMonday for the soul!
Thanks For stopping by Jill! I have to constantly remind myself of this very thing! Have a great week!
Lovely post. Thanks for the reminder that we are all int he same boat of parenting, we all worry and wonder and feel like failures from time to time, yet we are not! God bless you and your family!
Thanks, Hannah! It is nice to know we aren’t the only ones struggling, isn’t it? Have a wonderful week!
I love this! I often feel like I’m failing as a mom too, but then there’s that one thing that shows me that I’m not.
Thank you for the encouragement! We all have these moments!
Happy Monday from Open Mic Monday!
Megs
What an ah-ha moment! Keep your eye on the Truth and everything else will fall into place. I love it when we see God’s hand at work through our little ones. Blessings for a beautiful week!
Thanks Kelsey! I do love it when God teaches me through the littles!
So true! God is pursuing their hearts. When we don’t have the answers or fail in some way we can trust the One who never fails. Visiting from #cisneroscafe today 🙂
Thanks for stopping by Angela! Have a wonderful week!
“…when I’ve done all I can do, He will do what I cannot.” Such a relatable post. It’s always a pleasure to have you link to Open Mic Monday at #CisnerosCafe. Have a beautiful rest of your week, sweet friend. Hanging in there with you! 😀
Thanks Carolina! Praying for you! Have a great week!
Even though I am not a parent, the words of your child touch deeply because they have a far better understanding sometimes of what they are learning and what they need then we, as adult, do. I love it that God has our lessons ready and available through children so often. I teach through tutoring now and was a teacher/librarian. I always learned more than I taught, I do believe.
It’s so true, Linda! Just when I think I’m teaching them, I end up being the one learning from them! Thanks for visiting today! Have a wonderful week.
What a treasure that piece of writing is! That there is the reason we home educate. Knowing God, loving Him, trusting His word – if our kids are rooted in these truths, well everything else is just the icing on the cake, isn’t it? I absolutely love this post!! Thanks for linking up with Grace and Truth. I’m going to share this on my Facebook page right now since I just did a FB live video talking about this topic.
Thanks, Aimee! I’m learning the same thing! What I can’t do, God will do. Thanks for sharing and visiting today! Have a great weekend.
Alisa,
This. Just yes.
To the heart of every Mama because we just fall short all the time …. and it is okay. It’s okay because God fills our gaps. We do our best and He fills in the rest. Your daughter is precious. Jesus is deeply rooted in her heart and you are doing a beautiful job of training her up and surrendering to Jesus!
I’m sharing this all around!
Hugs,
Lori
Thanks, Lori! It’s so comforting knowing that God is in control. Thanks for stopping by and sharing today!
Thanks for the encouragement. I’ve been struggling with this with my two oldest daughters….they seem to have to strayed so very far from God and us but this is a reminder that God speaks “louder” than I do. They are in His care…He loves them even more than I do!
I’m so sorry to hear that Nikki! I can’t imagine how hard that is for you as a mom. But yes, I agree, God loves them even more and is keeping watch over them even if they are wanting to be watched. Praying He will send laborers to speak life into them and lead them back onto the right path.
Beautiful! Such true words. So often I can tend to think that I’m failing in the world’s eyes. The question is, though, “Am I failing in God’s eyes?” My favorite line of this whole post is this: “when I’ve done all I can do, He will do what I cannot.” That’s exactly what following after Christ is about-absolute trust. It’s funny how it’s so simple, but we often make it so hard.
Thank you, Rosanna! Absolutely trust- yes indeed! Trust is something that’s so easy to talk about, but so hard to do when it comes down to it.
This is such a great post! I absolutely love your daughter’s piece about God listening to our prayers! It’s true that where we lack, God’s strength shines and He is glorified! Thank you for sharing!
God bless,
Patty
Sometimes I beat myself up and think I have failed and then God shows me a little glimpse and reminds me- He is always pursuing my children. Thank you for your post and the prayer. I pinned it.