Do you struggle with how to respect your husband? Does his attitude or action make it difficult for you to honor him? Here are a few reasons to show respect to your husband even when he doesn't deserve it. #marriage #marriagetips #freeprintable

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A few weeks ago a beautiful friend of mine paid me a HUGE compliment after a staff meeting.

She expressed how awesome it was to see how much I honor and respect my husband in the boardroom.

I kindly thanked her, but inside….a war was going on.

I felt like a phony.

It quickly became clear to me that the wife that shows up to work each week is not the same wife my husband sees every day at home.

The wife at work honors her husband, respects his position, trusts his guidance and covers up his faults.

On the other hand, the wife at home often questions his authority and points out many things that he’s doing wrong.

The conviction God was showing me through this compliment was deep.

I knew I needed to correct the disconnect between the two, but I wasn’t sure how to do that.

As I began looking at scriptures and talking to God about these things, He began to point out some of the important reasons why I need to honor and respect my husband both at work and at home.

3 Important Reasons Why You Should Respect Your Husband

Do you struggle with how to respect your husband? Does his attitude or action make it difficult for you to honor him? Here are a few reasons to show respect to your husband even when he doesn't deserve it. #marriage #marriagetips #freeprintable

Unity

and the two are united into one. Since they are no longer two but one, Mark 10:8 NLT

One of the most important reasons we need to honor and respect our husbands is to maintain unity in the home.

I firmly believe there is a direct correlation between honoring and respecting our husbands and the unity we experience as a family.

In the home there should be one vision and one voice. 

My husband and I quickly learned that when we are divided, the kids will try to take over. (Proverbs 29:18)

I remember when my kids were little and they really wanted a new toy, they would come to me with what I call “cute eyes” and try to con me into buying it for them.

Sometimes I gave in.

However, other times I gave them a “sorry not today” response.

Almost immediately they would mosey over to their dad and ask him the same exact question. His first response was always, “Did you ask your mother?”

You see, we were on to their little shenanigans. 

Because my husband and I were on the same page, they weren’t able to pit us against each other.

We had ONE voice.

We have a mutual respect for one another that comes by recognizing our roles.

When it comes to work, I understand the responsibility that comes with the role of a CEO in business.

It’s important that the employees see that my loyalty and respect lie with my husband as head of the organization.

It maintains unity and order.

Now that my kids are older, I can easily forget that they need to see the same thing.

The issues they bring up are no longer toys, but things that my husband and I may not agree on.

Even in these moments, they need to know that no matter what, mom respects and honors dad and we are on the same page.

Peace

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Ephesians 5:22-33 NIV

Have you ever been in a situation where multiple leaders were fighting for control?

It’s really uncomfortable for everyone in the room.

For years that was the norm in our home.  I would buck my husband if I didn’t agree with the way he was leading our family. When he didn’t do something I thought was right, I was the first to say it….right in front of the kids. Every time that happened, my kids would end up bickering among each other and our house became unsettled.

As the head of the house, there are times when my husband has to make decisions that I may not agree with. Don’t get me wrong, he always gives me a say. But after I’ve shared my thoughts, I have to let it go. I have to respect his decision and trust that God is leading him.

As wives we are called to submit to our husbands…to allow them the freedom to lead our families. They may not do it the way we want them to, but ultimately our trust is in God not man. When we show honor and respect to our husbands, it creates order in our house, which in turn provides peace.

Ambassadors for Christ

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. 1 Peter 3:1-2 NLT

Our actions affect those around us. As ambassadors of Christ, we are walking testimonies of what the love of Jesus looks like.

I often forget this.

When my friend gave me the compliment a few weeks ago, I realized just how closely people are watching us.

Not just as individuals, but our relationships as well.

They notice when we are being rude. But even more so they are watching when we are honoring others, especially our spouses.

They are looking for true authenticity in Christianity. They want to see that we are walking out what we are confessing with our mouths.

For those whose husbands are not Christians, your actions are either drawing them to or away from Christ.

It’s the same for those around us.

Do you struggle with how to respect your husband? Does his attitude or action make it difficult for you to honor him? Here are a few reasons to show respect to your husband even when he doesn't deserve it. #marriage #marriagetips #freeprintable

Today I’m sharing a featured post by Beth at Messy Marriage. She dives a little deeper into the topic of honor and respecting our husbands and why it’s so important.

salt and light linkup

She says,

Christ-followers must choose to treat, in particular, their mates with respect, no matter how hard or unfair it might seem.

Now I’m not saying you have to feel respect for your mate’s unrespectable actions. However, you should never stoop to treat him or her with disrespect. So the difference is the action of respect versus the feelings of respect for your spouse.

To read more of Beth’s Post and some Biblical examples of choosing respect you can read her post:

>>>>>The Unfair Task of Respecting Your Mate No Matter What<<<<<

 

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6 Comments

  1. Love your vulnerability, Alisa! We all can use some improvement in this challenging area of marriage–myself included! Thanks for sharing a link to my blog post on respect too! You are sweet, my friend! You know I’ll be sharing all over!

  2. Alisa, thank you for reminding me that others do watch our actions; even our children. That is an important thing to keep in mind.

  3. Mitzi Neely says:

    I always want to love, honor and respect my husband. I also know there are days when I fall short. Thank you for reminding us about how powerful actions are and how to carefully choose our words. Love you friend.

  4. I absolutely love this and appreciate you writing this and guiding us in marriage. I am almost three years in being married, I am a mother of Five amazing kids and struggle balancing being a mother a wife that alone is a lot to balance and my husband and I are looking for more things to encourage us to make this work. We have a blended family and a lot of complicating issues on my end but my husband backs me up and he doesn’t get the respect and appreciation he deserves and I want to tell him I love him and cherish him more than he will ever know and these are the things we can do together to keep that love and companionship last forever ♥️ Thankyou for making this available

  5. Thank you so much for this post! I have been convicted of not respecting my husband’s position of authority here in our home as well. It is something the Lord has been speaking to my heart for a long time, and truthfully, I have been ignoring it. It is not by accident that your post was brought to my attention today. My husband and I have seven children together, one is grown and is on his own, but we still have 6 Little People at home with us. I have recognized that when my husband and I are standing with “one voice, one mission” there is so much peace to our days, it is only when we are standing on opposite sides of the battlefield that things get a little messy.

    God bless!

  6. This is so true: “My husband and I quickly learned that when we are divided, the kids will try to take over. (Proverbs 29:18)” I’ve seen it so many times in my own marriage. I appreciate your wisdom here! Pinning this for sure.

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